Wednesday, November 26, 2014

Usrah 1

Today was the first day I went to join an usrah with my friends here in Manchester. It was a small group of 9 people. I came unprepared and not knowing how it works but manage to fit in right away.
Usrah is a once in a week meet up, just to share our concerns and just talk about the topic being highlighted from the Quran.

I arrived seeing everyone already sat down in a circle then I saw Wan brought over cokodok pisang and I thought 'alamaaaak tak bawak makanan laaaaa guiltynyaaa dah la first day. bad first impression gilaaa' hehe but it was all good. I'm thinking of bringing cakes or deserts next week :) As I sat down, the kakak usrah (Fatin) was asking my name and stuff. She was really nice accepting newcomers. The usrah started off with Al-fatihah then set off to mukadimah where all of us just sort of kenalkan diri and just tell share personal stuff about ourselves. I didn't really want to jump into any 'over friendly' manners as I'm scared it might shock them hahaha So I was a bit toned down and behaved. SO NOT ME. hehe

Then Fatin explained how usrah works. Everyweek, we just pick a Surah from the Quran, but not the whole Surah. Just maybe one or two pages of the Surah, divide it around 5-6 ayat each and taking turns reading them. Fatin started then pass it down to the another Fatin (ye nama sama) on the right (lebih afdhal la katakan) then continued on to another person. Today we read the first two pages of Surah Ar-Rahman (Surah ke 55). Then once it's done, we read the translation so that we could understand further. Fatin gave us 2 minutes to just reflect and ask questions if we do have anything that we find confusing or anything related to our daily lives that we wanted to share.

The Surah talks about appreciation. How Allah wants us to appreciate what has been given to mankind. Allah gave us the sun, the moon and all of the trees growing beautifully. What more can we ask for?

Maka nikmat Tuhan-mu yang manakah yang kamu dustakan?
So which of the favors of your Lord would you deny?

This particular ayat was repeteadly mentioned in the Surah which highlights on what more do you need and want in this life? Why are you complaining of the amenities that had been sent from Allah?
But these sentences gave me the chills when I read them.

Semua ada dibumi itu akan binasa
Everything upon the earth will perish

tetapi wajah Tuhan-mu yang memliki Kebesaran dan Kemuliaan tetap kekal
And there will remain the Face of your Lord, Owner of Majesty and Honor

Maka nikmat Tuhan-mu yang manakah yang kamu dustakan?
So which of the favors of your Lord would you deny?

Apa yang diminta di langit dan di bumi selalu meminta kepada-Nya. Dia selalu dalam kesibukan.
Whoever is within the heavens and earth asks Him; every day He is bringing about a matter

Maka nikmat Tuhan-mu yang manakah yang kamu dustakan?
So which of the favors of your Lord would you deny?

Kami akan Memberi perhatian sepenuhnya kepadamu wahai (golongan) manusia dan jin.
We will attend to you, O prominent beings

Maka nikmat Tuhan-mu yang manakah yang kamu dustakan?
So which of the favors of your Lord would you deny?

Allah always listens. He is always there listening to our problems no matter how busy He is although we are not the only ones He is taking care off. But I feel so embarrassed. Embarrassed with the fact that I seldom seek him during my free time and just wants him during my hard times. Astaghfirullah...

We should be all grateful of the things we already have, be happy with it and keep praying that it would last a lifetime. InshaaAllah.

I find myself in the position where I do appreciate everything that's going on in my life but I can't help not feeling satisfied with everything. I always wanted more and just striving my best to meet the highest but now I learn that modesty is more than enough to shape a person. I have friends who are complacent and very dengki of other's achievements. I always tell them to be thankful and pray for them instead. If kita balas seseorang dengan perbuatan yang baik, InshaaAllah kita juga akan terima perkara yang sama. Have you heard of the quote 'The hardest part is to pray for someone even though we ourselves are struggling' ? It is so true and I hold that quote since the day I saw it. I am a quote-ic person. haha I find it very useful but only the positive one's lah. Just to get myself through the day :)

It was a really fun one hour of sharing individual problems and talk just about anything! Thank you so much to friends here in Manchester who are concern of my well being and thank you so much for inviting. I'll come next week and share some more! :)

Akhir kata, yang baik datangnya dari Allah SWT, Yang buruk itu datang dari kelemahan diri saya semdiri.


It's really funny how people starts relating their life with the things they read online, book, wherever.
If you have anything to say, say it to my face. Don't go back around and assuming things.
and cursed me anytime you want. That's rude. I never did such things to anyone.

Since when expression of emotions and feelings be seen as a crime? You are more than welcome here. If you hate what you read here then go hang out somewhere else. It's fine. seriously okay? Just don't assume and hey if you are curious with whatever I post, please do come forward and ask.

This is why sometimes you just need to ignore people's feelings towards you because nothing is ever enough. Just be yourself and be happy. If people like you, they will be there. if they don't they'll fly away.

Wednesday, November 19, 2014

How watches define you.

Have you wonder how technology nowadays changed so rapidly, it effects the way we lead our social life without us realizing it? I mean, like just now, I went to Subway (yes, it's Halal, thank you for asking. :D ) to buy my favourite sandwich of all, BLT. I've been craving for it since I last ate it in Malaysia. But apparently it was closed still. I didn't know what time it was so I just instantly asked the next person who walks past by me. 
He responded back after he had check his phone to see the time displayed on his Iphone screen. But didn't he realize that he was WEARING A WATCH! a Tag Heuer! (yes, I do have eagle eyes)  It was so funny that I couldn't hold myself from saying 'haha, thank you, but what time does your watch tells you then?' He just exploded with laughter and just said 'thank you for reminding me'

Even though everyone nowadays is telling the time by glancing at the cell phone screen, but for me, watches will never be out of style. EVER! The cellphone screen may easily tell you the time whenever you want, but they could never beat watches as watches acts as an accessory to complete a person’s outfit. I feel so awkward not wearing a watch. I am an 'accessories type of girl' where I couldn't go out bare handed. I would either wear bracelets, a watch, rings, etc. It really portrays how I am and how my character is. Even so, the choice of watches is also important as it portrays your personality in front of others without you realizing it. 

Women are known to be a fan of shopping and will purchase various design of watches they fall in love with. The most popular watch a woman will have in their collection is a leather strap watch. The ladies who choose to wear a leather strap watch are seen to love a versatile appearance. This is because leather strap watches will never jeopardize your look whether you are in your casual clothes or even office attire. I am a big fan of leather strap watches! Everytime I shop online, especially Zalora (my favvvvv), I would definitely browse for the leather strapped type. But then came the difficult part which was to choose the best colour or quality! As always, shopping makes you go crazy sometimes! haha 
Another top selection women are purchasing in the market is nice gold watches. Gold watches are chosen by women because it gives a more sophisticated yet elegant touch to their outfit. Women can wear it to the office to show off a professional character or spice it up with some fancy bangles on a day out. Play with gold bracelets or multi-coloured bangles to create a fun funky appearance.

Fashion watches are also one of the top favourite picks women love matching with their outfits. The fashion watches are designed with a slight hint of creative colour combinations, embellished beads and chains for women to show off their different side of personalities. It shows the fun out-going personality you have which others may hardly see. Women can definitely create multiple looks with the stunning fashion watch designs sold to fit their personal taste. Interested to add some new watches for women to let others know you better?

You guys should definitely check out ZALORA for their wide range of watches online for women from various local and international brands. I go there all the time for latest fashion trends ranging from clothes to handbags to shoes to bracelets to shawls to EVERYTHING! It is such a place for stress-reliever! haha 

Until next 'time' :)

Tuesday, November 11, 2014

You told me I'm the hardest

Just had a midnight post disneyland conversation with Mirul today. And Cant you believe it, I lost my voice!! So all of the conversations were just on off whispering growl voices. Gggggr.
I told him about what happened and without realizing that I havent stopped talking for two hours straight. Haha then I just stopped because i didnt want to sound like a talkative burung murai but he didnt want me to stop. I'm just beyond happy to have found someone so great. He is amazing. Really. 
Whenever we talked about the past, we would just laugh just because we thought about how far we got into this position. So funny. Just those hardships and heartbreaks involved, its just so sad to know but those are just life lessons we learn and hopefully not to be repeated in our storybook. 
He said I'm the hardest girl he's ever been with and I just felt so confused. Did I pressure him or anything? But he just said that he loves it when he felt that hardness and exhaustion in our relationship. That's just shows how he really is doing his part for us and caring about me all of the hours of the day. He just loves the fact that I'm difficult and maybe that explains why he always smiled when I appologized for being so hard on him. I don't know whats going through his mind but I'm really glad when he said that he can't imagine if I'm not there with him. I am just beyond grateful to be with this crazy guy. He is my dude. Always. 


Im so glad that I went to Paris for the weekend just to get my mind of things. Its been really fun and just im overly joyed with just everything!

It was a magical weekend. And alhamdulillah things got better with me and Mirul. It's all good now. Hahaha penat lah argue. Maybe just two people care about each other so much. :) 

Friday, November 7, 2014

Day 2

When someone becomes something you need, nothing else that comes in the way matters. 

Because beyond the imperfections of him, you see the things you need that would make u a better person.

I hope he sees that in me just as much as I see those in him. 

As mad as I could be, there's a little small space in the corner I left just for you to fill in. 

Thursday, November 6, 2014

this is my 0536

this is the confession of a shattered heart.

All I want is the happy moments back
All I want is those smiles and weird things you said
All I want is the soothing late night calls we had
All I want is for us to be okay

I don't know what I'm supposed to do
I don't know what more should I do
I don't know where should I start changing
I don't know where should I start.

But my heart is massively hurt and shattered
But my hopes of you just dimmed it's light gradually
But my strength just can't go on any longer
But me myself can't forgive you just yet.

Just I wish you would be more merciful
Just I wish your heart would soften
Just I wish you learn about patience
Just I wish you would accept me for me.

my love, my care, my hidden secrets
my acts, my behaviours, my good and bad side,
my laughters. my weird non funny jokes, my childside
my clumsiness, my stubbornness and just myself

You are the perfect form which fits in all my empty spaces.
You are the best gift that Allah have gave me
You are so wonderful you just don't realize it
and believe this,
You are the only person in this world I'm afraid of losing.

I'm so hurt, O Allah. 
Release me from this pain.
I beg of you. Show me the way to greatness.
If this is what made of me, I accept in return of your plans for me.
But please, I don't want to lose this man.
Let our path ease as our relationship grows.
You are the Greatest. You are Most Merciful.
Help me, O Allah.

LA HAWLA WA LA QUWWATA ILLA BILLAH : لاحول ولا قوة الا بالله
The meaning of this expression is: ” There is no power and no strength save in Allah.” This expression is read by a Muslim when he is struck by a calamity, or is taken over by a situation beyond his control. A Muslim puts his trust in the hands of Allah, and submits himself to Allah.